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It may as well be said here that I have serious issues with “traditional religion” and am greatly opposed to much of their doctrine. When you have to control people through instilling a fear of hell and eternal damnation into them, there is something wrong with what you are doing.

Having grown up with neither a belief nor disbelief in a heaven and hell, I was free to come to my own realizations, through my own personal experiences – and not through something that had been written in fragments over a period of hundreds if not thousands of years. In my experience, the only hell that exists is the one that we construct for ourselves. When we refuse to move on from our issues and we continue to dwell upon past mistakes and errors we become our own worst enemy.

These demons that we create have power, the power to control us … should we allow them. As like attracts like, the more we obsess over past failures the more likely we are to repeat them.

As a psychic, I have the ability to instantly recall events from the lives of those who have passed on. When I do such, and the connection is not only a strong one, but one that is rich with information regarding traumatic events that occurred to them, it becomes a visceral experience for me. I will feel adrenaline coursing through me, elevated heart rate, fear and other emotions can become very intense. Whatever physical injuries that may occur will be felt by myself (though not quite as painful – usually) It’s like watching a movie, and becoming one with the action on the screen, quite the ride!

Imagine being able to tap into any point in your life and recalling it with such detail and emotion. We all have that ability once passed and we can become wrapped up in it, a self induced psychosis if you will.

When a person takes their own life, it is often a final desperate act – designed to stop the hurting. Sadly the hurting only truly begins once the person takes their own life … that is until they go through their “life review” in the process of crossing over. Taking one’s life frequently results in additional trauma for those left on earth in the physical world and does not end ones problems. Now that they are dead they have no choice but to witness the additional pain and suffering that their selfish act has resulted in bringing to the ones left behind and to those in spirit watching them. If unable to face the life review and crossing over to the other side, they may end up a “tortured soul” stuck between worlds.

Add to all the above drama, a fear of hell, a fear instilled in you by your society, community,  family and the “pillars” of your community – the “religious” leaders and you have a really big problem with the concept of crossing over – not being scary to someone who feels that they may have “sinned.”

Recently I was fortunate to help someone who was tortured in such a way. The names, locations, ages, and dates have been changed to protect the privacy of the family and those involved.

During a recent phone reading it became clear that the boy that was being asked about was both deceased and traveling around as a ghost. He refused to come through during the  reading and it was only at the end of the reading while I was doing a wrap up and discussing what the client should do with some of the material that came through, that he decided to make the crossing.

This young man of 20 had confessed to his girlfriend that he thought he might be gay and that he was not attracted to her. His girlfriend then threatened to tell everyone she knew about him and he freaked out. Being that this was in a conservative part of the mid-west, it was something that this gentleman was afraid was going to destroy him in the community.  He was so depressed and frightened that he hung himself.

The church that his family went to almost didn’t have a service for him. The pastor initially refused, as the guy had committed suicide, after some “soul searching” he relented and presided over the funeral proceedings. The reason for him taking his life was chalked up to drug abuse as he had an addictive personality and was abusing drugs prior to taking his life. Little did the majority of the community know that he had taken a secret to the grave with him, well almost. Not too long after his death, word of the real reason came to light after his ex-girlfriend began chatting about his conversation with him, prior to his passing.

This individual was so wrapped up in sorrow and anger combined with depression and a fear of going to hell that he was stuck as a ghost. He was continuing to hover around those connected to him and was hurting them with his intensely angry, addictive, depressed, lonely, fearful, and loathsome personality coming through. I was in the middle of chatting about him and how the woman who I had just finished a reading with, needed to take a step back from him. She had a picture of him and though she never really knew him, her husband and others were very close to him and she was being affected by his ghostly presence, as were others from his life. After telling her to let him go, I began the process of calling him to cross over.

I addressed him directly, even though I had not yet established a connection with him, I knew that he had to be listening. I told him that he had nothing to fear and that he should cross over and enter his life review. I implored him to do this not only for himself, but for those whom he cared about, as his presence at this time was detrimental to those whom he loved. I let him know that he could return to see his loved ones after crossing over and after taking the weight off his shoulders. I also informed him that the had loved ones in spirit waiting to meet him, (his grandmother showed up.) Very quickly he came through and confirmed his desire to cross over, I felt a shudder go through me and as he entered the room I was in, his presence brought with it an almost suffocating feeling. I felt the weight of his burdens and angst and watched as he met with his grandmother and stepped into the light to begin his life review. As he left there was a palatable shift in the rooms energy and I felt this sudden lifting sensation within the atmosphere. Suddenly it was lighter, as it was before his presence had appeared.

While all of this was taking place, the woman who I was doing the reading for, felt him come and go as well. She and I then ended the reading, with far more accomplished that we had expected to achieve. During the crossing I had wept spontaneously and though somewhat drained I also felt elated.

Due to the hate filled sermons and the intolerance that so many spew in the name of “god” these types of scenarios will continue to play out over and over. Not until we as a society move away from a fear based religion influenced society and on to an environment where we are tolerant and respectful of those who are not like us, will we find peace.

I am yet to encounter evidence that those who are homosexual, go to hell – I do however have plenty of evidence that our society can in essence assist in creating a hell, though not entirely in the biblical sense. One of my favorite quotes regarding the subject of homosexuality is a comment I heard from Harvey Milk. Once while his spirit was paying me a visit he said that “Anyone who masturbates, is at least part bisexual.” What I have witnessed is that love is love and hate is hate, your sexual orientation has nothing to do with it.

It is with great anticipation that I look forward to a world filled with love and devoid of all talk of eternal damnation, hell, demons and sin. I am not saying that there is no right and wrong, just that we should perhaps move out of the dark ages and leave the bigotry and hate behind.

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There seems to be a lot of confusion over the definitions applied to ghosts and spirits. Many times people may use the two terms interchangeably when in fact the two though similar are quiet different.

We are all spirits inside our physical bodies. Think: Car=body & driver = spirit.

The spirits of those who have passed, (died) have two choices upon their death.

The first choice is to “cross over” that involves stepping into a “tunnel” of white light and then being “whisked away” to another dimension – the other side, heaven, summerland … there are many names for it, but I will simply refer to it as “the other side” and then going through a life review.

The second option involves ignoring the white tunnel of light and instead remaining on earth, however unable to move between the two worlds and able to keep a close eye on things connected with your last life on earth. By making the choice to stay (for the time being) you have essentially become a ghost. While as a ghost you have the same body as a full fledged spirit from the other side, however you are vibrating at a lower frequency and are not able to move freely between the planes of existence.

Let’s discuss what happens when you elect to cross over. I must inform you that it is not a world like ours, and therefore it is difficult at best to describe it, in fact I will not bother to describe it, except to say that it seems to be a nice enough place and very similar in many respects to our world, yet vastly different. Spirits who come down from the other side tend to be relatively tightlipped regarding actual details of that dimension and so I will focus more on the difference between ghosts and spirits. I do know however that all of us must go through a “life review.” This life review allows us to see how our actions and thoughts have affected those around us and even the world at large. It is more of a learning experience rather than one where you are being judged and condemned for anything that you did to others that was harmful or hurtful in anyway. Regardless of what the other side is like, we all go through a process called a life review. This is not a judgment rather an opportunity to learn from our most recent incarnation and to appreciate how our thoughts, words and actions affected not only ourselves, but those around us. If you hurt someone physically, you too will feel what it felt like to be harmed by you and how it made them feel emotionally and physically.

After going through the life review, it is my understanding that you are then freed up to explore yourself and the other side. One of the greatest things that is revealed to you, is the history of your past lives. Once you begin to view your life as the sum of your lifetimes versus the results of a single lifetime, frequently you lose some of the interest in the intimate details associated with your most recent life and will begin to be far less attached to the way that things play out after leaving earth from your most recent incarnation into a physical form. This little detail seems to be what keeps some very well informed and “aware” spirits from moving on and staying earthbound as “ghosts” even though they “get it”.

Just as in life, so too in death there are those who understand what is going on better than others, just take a look around you. There are people who are great at “playing” the game of life, they are full of energy, tend to be a pleasure to be around and tend to be successful with good jobs and a great family life. On the other end of the spectrum, there are those who cannot seem to get it together. They tend to be the ones who end up homeless, wandering around aimlessly, no real purpose or understanding of how life works here. The same can be said for spirits once they cross, there are those who “get it” and those who do not. Let us discuss those who do not “get it” for a moment.

When someone dies, they tend to feel as though they still have a physical body. Many times there is confusion associated with a tragic and sudden passing such as a car crash. One moment you are fine and the next moment you are standing outside of the vehicle that just wrecked and even though you feel “fine” you can see your body laying there … broken, perhaps mangled. This tends to result in the person who just died, going into shock for a moment as they come to grips with what just happened. In some cases this is all it takes to become a ghost, they may refuse to accept that they are dead and avoid crossing with the hopes that it is all just a bad dream, a nightmare that they will soon wake from. This happens sometimes to people who die in their sleep, where they refuse to accept it. I had one where a lady who had passed at the age of 78 in her sleep, did not believe she was dead, she told me that she watched her funeral, but that it could not possibly have been real because she saw her body in the casket and being lowered in the ground, but was not in the casket herself … so therefore it had to be a nightmare that she could not wake from.

When there is unfinished business that needs to be resolved, it is not uncommon for a spirit to stay as a ghost, until the issue is resolved as many of them realize that they will not care as much once they cross. Ghosts have a bad rap since most of the cases we hear about are the angry ones … “content” (if there is such a thing) ghosts tend to make less of a fuss and tend to not get noticed as much. Angry spirits who have not crossed, such as the ghost of a serial killer who took his own life as the police were closing in on him would be a good example of the type of ghost that Hollywood has latched onto in so many horror movies. The dangers associated with interacting with such a ghost are genuine, though typically not nearly as freaky as shown on the silver screen.

An angry ghost may try and use a living persons body to act out, such as in a “possession”. This is fairly rare since you must allow the ghost to merge with you in order for this to take place. If you do not want to merge, it is fairly easy to resist, however … some enjoy the adrenaline rush and chaos that erupts when they become “possessed” and the host may actually get a “kick” channeling the spirit of the angry ghost.

In my experience often times those who report seeing a ghost are in fact reporting on the appearance of someone who is connected to them. Making yourself visible, or a full manifestation is not an easy thing to do and requires great effort on the part of the ghost. Frequently ghosts will connect with us without bothering to become visible to the naked eye, instead you may feel a coldness, an uncomfortable/unsettled feeling and or other sensations such as unusual smells and odd pains or shortness of breath, often associated with the ghosts manner of passing.

When called in to assist with a “haunted” location the first thing I do is to see if I can establish a dialogue with the ghost and or spirits connected to either the person or location that I am looking into. Ghosts can and do travel, they can be connected to the land or a building, but even then they are capable of traveling anywhere that they choose to go. In order to cross one of them over, I will try and find out what it is that is keeping them from moving on and if possible I will assist them in taking care of any unfinished business and if at the very least will give them someone to talk to. Once the “issue” has been resolved, (if possible) then I will call upon their family members who are on the other side to come and assist me with moving the “ghost” on to the other side.

Spirits on the other side can travel anywhere they please to including into the ghostly ream as well as anywhere in the universe while ghosts are earthbound. Spirits are at a much higher frequency than ghosts. Imagine if you will that in order to cross to the other side you must pass through a mesh screen. While holding onto your earthbound “baggage/issues” you are not able to pass through the fine mesh screen, however those who have dropped/processed their baggage are able to cross though with ease, both “up” to the other side and back “down” to this side.

Some ghosts are proud of their status as a ghost and may relish their position. Many I have spoken to who reside at historical inns, restaurants and the like … consider themselves to be good for the business as many may visit simply in hopes of catching a glimpse of the ghost purported to be on the property. Other ghosts stay behind on battlefields as ambassadors/caretakers of the land and in order to ensure that we never forget the events connected to such places so that we may not repeat them. Ghosts who are associated with locations popular for committing suicide (such as the golden gate bridge and the empire state building) may stay behind in order to attempt to scare people off from following in their footsteps.

Sadly the church especially the Catholic one has helped to “create” a great number of ghosts. When you are told all your life that once you pass you will be judged by St. Peter and either sent to heaven or to hell for all of eternity, you may choose to skip the life review/visit with St. Peter and simply stay where you are, in essence creating your own little “hell” and staying earthbound as a ghost.

If you feel that you may have a ghost or spirit hanging around your home or place of business and would like some answers, visit www.charlespeden.com.

November 2018
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